Fellow Adventurers, welcome to Camp Adventurous!
The following is a list of reasons why I am qualified to be the King Adventurer:
1. I once put out a match on my tongue, and it wasn't even a big deal.
2. I once swam a whole mile without stopping (it was awful).
3. I use Mane n' Tail shampoo and conditioner, which has instructions for both human and animal use.
4. My mom says I can do anything I put my mind to (she never said that, but I hope she would if I asked her to).
5. I created the blog, so I can do whatever I want.
Camp Adventurous is a place where we bask in the glory of all that I accomplish from week to week. It is effectively a journal of my grandeur. For example, this week there's a some-assembly-required bunk bed that has been sitting in my room for a month needing some assembly while I sleep on the nearby couch. I think I'll get to it this week!
Yesterday, as I was doing the dishes (because I'm incredible), I realized something. Water was spraying from the gap between the faucet and the Brita water filter, soaking my shirt with a fine but constant mist, and it occurred to me that everyone I know needed to hear about this.
Like the scent of old canned tuna water, wafting up from the sink into my nostrils, the idea of becoming a full-time Adventurer filled my mind. Like a piece of old food stuck to a plate and impossible to scrub away, that idea clung to my mind. And like the faulty faucet, it now sprays out like a constant fine mist over the pages of the internet.
Wikipedia tells us that an Adventurer is, and I quote, "One that seeks adventure (also, one that attempts to gain wealth and social position by unscrupulous means, but disregard that)." That is my goal. I seek to do those things which are hard to do, which many mortal men are terrified of doing.
I seek to build a bunk bed.